ALPHA KAPPA ALPHA

College.  Who doesn't fondly look back upon their college days, as the good ones?  People who haven't attended?  Those who suffer from dimentia?  Alright, I'm done asking rhetorical questions to myself while I write.  My point is: College was a great time, and I really found myself.  In oodles and oodles of debt.

Even to this day I remember the first college girl I exchanged numbers with.  Why we didn't just keep the ones we had, I'll never know.  She was a good girl, working an extra job through the federal work study program at the school.  She worked at the strip club they attached to the dorms.  She had to pick up the extra work, because in the rough economy Frat parties even had to charge girls to get in.  They issued a statement saying, "We're sorry, but with the rising costs of alcohol, and the fact that we're all in stable loving relationships, we're going to have to charge everyone $5 to get in.  BYOB."  That was of course interpreted from their original statement : "ALPHA KAPPA ALPHA, ALPHA KAPPA ALPHA, ALPHA KAPPA ALPHA ROCKS!"

Throughout college I did develop emotionally.  But I also learned a lot, going to classes and studying.  Nothing made classes harder than those characters I'd meet though.  You know the ones, the ones who couldn't speak a word of english or the ones who would just smoke pot and have themselves a good giggle all class.  Those were just the good professors.(Note to professors: Haha, just kidding.  How's that letter of recommendation coming?  Do you need help translating it into English?)

Since then I've been paying off my student loans and working.  My financial advisor was really helpful in determining which repayment plan was best for me.  There were just so many: I could pay a set monthly amount that would never change, for ten years; I could pay an increasing amount over the course of ten years; or they could shoot my girlfriend and dog.  It was a tough choice, but I decided that running away to a foreign country and starting a blog was my best bet.

If anyone knows any good lawyers who specialize in "how to sneak back into a country, not go to jail for loan evasion, and apologizing to your girlfriend and dog" I'd really appreciate a referral.

PS: If you work for the government, I'm just kidding about the loan evasion.
PPS: If you don't work for the government, that first post script was a lie.